Review: The Courage to be Disliked

The Courage to be Disliked by Ichiro Kishimi
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Inspiring, thought-provoking and deeper than a Taylor Swift song.

'All you can do with regard to your own life is choose the best path that you believe in. On the other hand, what kind of judgement do people pass on that choice? That is the task of other people, and is not a matter you can do anything about.'

This quote kinda sums up the book. It's about returning the focus to only what you can affect, and living your own life a moment at a time.

There are some ideas here that are familiar to me but I really enjoyed the way they were approached. Yes, you need to have the courage to be who you believe you should be, with no influence from the opinions of others. This book discusses how that becomes possible. It's not something you can change instantly, despite what this book suggests. You need to be open, and work constantly to remind yourself of practising task separation etc. You need to continue working at these habits until they become second nature. Like anything, changing your mindset requires practice.

Okay. Let's talk about the ugly stuff.

There are some really tough ideas here; one in particular being, 'trauma does not exist'. This is quite damaging if you take it at surface level, but once you understand the Alderian psychological viewpoint they are communicating, it becomes a little clearer. It's not about victim blaming or anything similar - it's about how a person responds to traumatic events. And yes, it is really tough to comprehend, but the notion is that people who let their life be defined by traumatic events in their past are holding onto it for some subconscious purpose. I think when you contemplate it further, it goes a way to explaining why some people are broken by trauma, where others become stronger. But the whole overall concept is about living life in the moment so it makes sense that they are discarding past events. If you're offended easily, this is one section that's going to put you off completely. But if you're open-minded, let the book explain itself and it might actually help you with overcoming trauma.

This book is quite easy to read, which is uncommon for a book that deals with some pretty heavy material. The format of the Youth vs Philosopher in conversation means that objections you might have are likely to be addressed. There were some objections that I thought were a bit ridiculous, so I guess how you feel about the format will depend on how skeptical you are.

I wouldn't necessarily call this a hippie book, but it's very in line with the 'mindfulness' trend that's been taking over the world lately. Its simplicity will help it reach a wider audience and it's quite logical. It gets a little confusing in parts but overall there are some great nuggets of wisdom contained within its text.

I really enjoyed reading this, but could only do so at certain times because if you don't quite process a sentence you lose track easily. So make sure your mind is open when you read it and you should take away a lot of new ideas.

Then all you have to do is drink.

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